Lion King sucked

I saw The Lion King on stage in Las Vegas on Saturday, and except for the costumes and stage, it could have been done by a high school for Math, Science, and Engineering students.  So sad.  This was the Tony-Award winner.

First off, the sound was awful.  You could hardly hear.  If I didn't already have most of the dialogue memorized from watching the movie so many times, I wouldn't have been able to tell what was going on.  All the emotion (if there was any from the actors) was lost because it was so hard to hear and follow.

And the additions to the play that aren't in the musical are laughable and actually detract from the story.  There's the Scar-and-Nala (call them Nar) forced romance angle, that doesn't extend beyond a single scene and just disappears from the story after one song about it.  And Simba's should-have-been-show-stopping-number plays like he's a completely different character than the one in the scenes just before and after.  And the big note at the end wasn't held out for any effect at all.

And the choreography was the (unintentionally) funniest part.  The director would send out some costumed animal running and leaping, and occasionally twirling across the stage during scene changes.  During numbers that exist specifically to show off the dancers, all they do is twirl and jump.  I had just come from seeing actual choreography, like this:

That was taken on my way into the Holiday Dance competition held at Luxor over the weekend.  My nephew, Malachi and his partner took second in their Latin group.  Here's about twenty seconds of them, shot before I found out I wasn't allowed to video tape the performances.

This was actual dancing.  Lion King was jumping while music played.  At least I think music was playing.  I couldn't really hear.

CTR? Nope

At the hotel pool today we went to the hot tub.  Getting out was a guy with a beer and several tattoos.  As he walked by and we exchanged passing greetings, I looked back as I passed and saw that his backwards hat said CTR on it.

Seriously?  Sure thought so.  The T was a sword, and I've seen rings with that design before.

He came back in the hot tub later with another drink and the same hat, so I could get a better look.  We asked him what the CTR stood for.  He had no idea, but he sure talked fun explaining that.  He's from Vancouver, and talks like he was in Strange Brew--like how I talk when I want to make fun of Canadians, eh.



On close inspection, I could see the CTR was actually a backwards D and an R (I didn't have my camera--I was in a hot tub--so no picture) with the straight left side of the R being a sword and the hit above the logo.  Wow, did that look like CTR.

Instead, it was more like DTR, which is another Utah acronym, but one that means something much different and much more annoying.

Claim Jumper desserts

Someone asked me what my favorite restaurant was the other day.  I had a hard time coming up with one because I love so many.  But really I had a hard time because my favorite place I hardly ever get to visit--there are none within 400 miles of my house.  It's Claim Jumper.  (What's a Claim Jumper besides an awesome restaurant?  It's one who illegally occupies property to which another has a legal claim.)

So, whenever I'm in a city that has one, I stock up.  CJ is good for its food, but is fantastic for its dessert.  The menu used to be more like a novel, but they've shortened it since I went last.  Still, they have steaks, ribs, and chicken, plus pasta, pizza, sandwiches, pot pies, soups, and, the most delicious desserts.

The best is the Chocolate Chip Calzone, which I ordered to eat today.

It's rich, but the bread is unsweetened so you can eat more than you think.  It is a heavenly dessert.

To take home to Utah with me, I ordered a Raspberry and White Chocolate Cream Cheese Pie, which is better than cheesecake, and a Lemon Bar Brulee, which is as good as it sounds.  These both are in the fridge at the hotel and travel well.  A lucky girl will get to share this with me once I get back home.

I didn't order the I d'Eclair, which is an eclair with Bavarian Cream and Ice Cream the size of a football.

It's awesome if you're staying at the restaurant and have four people to help you eat it, but the ice cream doesn't travel well on six hour road trips, no matter how cold it is outside.

Amazing whom you run into

I went an hour out of town for an adventure on Wednesday and ran into more people I knew than I usually do at Costco, where you always run into someone you know.  It's Christmas season, so I thought it would be fun to go to the North Pole on the Heber Valley Railroad.

And since I'm going to Heber, why not find a fun new place to eat.  Trip Advisor rescues me at these times, and let me know about he Sidetrack Cafe.  Their kitchy website made me a little nervous--sometimes these little restaurants close up shop on you without leaving such an announcement on their website or making their coupons disappear.  Happily, I didn't have any coupons.

Sidetrack is more coffee shop than restaurant, but every Wednesday they do a pasta dinner with live music.  I was going on Wednesday, so this must've been meant to be!  But when we got there, this sign was on the door:

On the one hand, that sucks, because I was really looking forward to some pasta and live music. On the other hand, what a great adventure!  We passed a barbecue place right on the way over, so let's go there.

And eating my brisket sandwich, Chris Anderson (does anyone else always end up typing "Christ" when you just mean "Chris"?), former board chair at Weilenmann School of Discovery, one of my many client charter schools, whose former school saves lots of money on administrative expenses.

Then it was off to the train station to catch the creeper to the North Pole.  

And who was waiting to board, but Gayle Ruzicka, head of Utah's Eagle Forum, whom I've met once or twice, the first time in college when she was a guest speaker in a class on social movements opposite a gay-rights advocate.  (Fireworks!)

And after an hour, who gets on the train but my buddy Santa Claus (does anyone else always end up typing "Clause" when you just mean "Claus"?  Damn you, Tim Allen!), whom I hadn't seen in close to a year.  He didn't even remember me and just passed right on by my seat to say hi to some dumb kids sitting in front of and behind me.

But I sang songs with gusto anyway, but not as loud in the train as on the car ride home.  "Snow Globe" by Matt Wertz (who? I have no idea) is the best new Christmas song this year, and you all ought to download it.

Lucky I had a great burger

Here's the burger I had for dinner tonight.

It's the Celestial Burger from Lucky 13, a bar that gives its burgers tongue-in-cheek names.  This has bacon, cheddar cheese, grilled onions and barbecue sauce, as well as leafy lettuce and tomatoes.  That's a fried pickle in the basket along with some beer-battered onion rings.

The bun was fantastic, the barbecue sauce was sweet, and the meat was perfectly cooked.  The Cajun fries were also awesome.  I've had better fried pickles, though.

Lucky 13 is across West Temple from Spring Mobile Ballpark, and they have the leg lamp from A Christmas Story as part of their decor.  All in all a kitschy and delicious place.

Traffic School

I got a ticket in the worst spot, I-15 through Utah County.  I was going too fast, having a fun conversation on the phone and didn't notice my speed.  Deserved it, but that doesn't make it any less annoying to have to pay a double fine ($290!) plus the cost of traffic school.

Last time I was in traffic school was because I was a devoted husband and I went with my wife when she got a ticket.  That was many years ago, and we went to a classroom and listened to a police officer give three hours of driving safety.  But technology has moved on since then, and now traffic school is online.

It's quite the package too.  They've come up with a good way to keep me from cheating.  You have to spend at least three hours online "in" traffic school, but with a limit as to the amount of time you can spend on any one page.  You really have to go through all the material and answer all the questions.

I started on Sunday morning, but three hours is a really long time.  In fact, it's as long as church.  I'm bringing my iPad anyway, because it has the scriptures and all the manuals on it.  And it's hard to hear in Elders' Quorum anyway.  So, thanks, Steve Jobs, you really made church productive.  I got through the rest of traffic school no problem.

And I actually liked learning some things.  I found out that no one ever actually has the "right-of-way," but rather drivers in certain situations (like turning left) must yield the right of way to other cars.  I also found out that failure to drive defensively can get you cited in the event of an accident even if the accident was the fault of someone who failed to yield the right of way.

Anyway, I thought I would be a better driver--more careful, more defensive.  But today when I saw a car in the right turn only lane who wanted to get into my lane, I could have let him in, but I didn't because it was my right-of-way.  And this was after I sneaked into the right turn lane to get around a long line at the traffic light and then sneaked back in when I found a small, but large enough, opening.

Some habits are hard to break.

Jonathan Toomey

When I was in college, I worked at Deseret Book.  I was taken in by the cover of a new children's Christmas book one year, The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey by Susan Wojciechowski.

It's a story of a wood carver, Toomey, who suffers from the loss of a wife and child, and Thomas and his mother who ask the carver to carve a Nativity set to replace one they've lost.

It's full of beautiful prose that is better read aloud--the sounds of the vowels and the cadence is meant to be performed, as many great children's books are. Illustrations, by P.J. Lynch are also fantastic.

The book can't be more than 24 pages, but loses nothing for its brevity.  I had it in my head that I would make a great movie of the book one day, but discovered today that someone beat me to it.  And now there are musical versions playing on stage, including at SCERA in Orem.

This version adds music, about a dozen characters, and about 90 minutes, but adds nothing in the way of connection to the main characters or emotion to the story.

Do yourself a favor--read this book.