White trash food courts

Austin is a fun food town, I judge after spending a single weekend here and eating some below average convention food.  The totally fun part is the kitschy food parks, trucks, and trailers that are throughout the city, including right next to my hotel.

The Austin Food Park, open only a month, I find out, is next to the Holiday Inn where I stayed on Town Lake.  It has about eight of what can only charitably be called food "trailers."  Some of them are more like food "outhouses."  (Said with love and in reference only to their size, not their smell or quality of food.)

Sorry this is so dark.  I got excited and took the picture at night. When my flash went off, the people at the nearby table (not in the picture) laughed because they thought I was taking a picture of the hooker at the bbq joint.  I was just taking a picture of the food park, but the hooker makes for good imagery anyway.

So we ate at the Thai one on the first night, ordering green curry and something with beef and hot peppers in it.  They were both moderately spicy, and I quickly discovered the disadvantage of food parks: no waiters to refill your drink.  But both were delicious and at only $16 bucks for both, a great bargain.

The next morning we got breakfast burritos at a place called "Crucitas Kitchen."  I don't know what that means, but I went on calling it "Cruciatus Kitchen," joking that eating there would be torture.  It wasn't.  Their tortillas and salsas were yummy, even if their offerings weren't anything special (eggs, potatoes, bacon, sausage, cheese, etc.  They did have chorizo as an option, which we got and was fine.)  Still, at only $6 for two to eat breakfast, another bargain.

Two days later I had a burger from the burger outhouse for lunch.  I go the one with chorizo and queso. It was fine, but less of a bargain ($6 for just the burger) than the others.

There was also a chicken place, a bbq place (why would I ever go there when I can go here), and some kind of juicy place that I couldn't figure out and wasn't open when I was at the place.

And there was more down the street.  Rainey Street, to be exact.  It's a street of mostly decrepit old hosues that have been converted into bars, clubs, and restaurants.  But because of a city ordinance requiring that business there can only operate in original structures, the houses are all left in tact, sometimes remodeled, with trailers, tables, and whatnot put in the back or side yards.

Here's one that hasn't been turned into a business yet, just to give you a flavor of the neighborhood.

This one is a sausage house and beer garden.  It was always crowded on the picnic tables in the backyard.

This one is called "The White House," and it's been refurbished in front to look fancy. The sign in front says "United Nations of Food."  Their outhouses include Greek, Mexican, and Vietnamese joints.  There's also a spaceship in front along with a Weekly World News headline telling you that this spacecraft landed at the actual White House.

Maybe this sort of food would get old over time, but it sure was fun to eat at for a visitor, especially when it was sunny and 80 degrees every day.

Sufjan Stevens, the Athiest who loves Christmas

"Sufjan who?" you ask?

And I'll tell you that Sufjan Stevens is the very unique name of a very unique singer and songwriter.  I've decided I like him, even though I can't figure him out at all.

Later he dressed up as a neon unicorn with balloon wings.  I wish I'd gotten a good shot of that.

I went to his concert last night at a club called Emo's, which sounded like it wouldn't be my crowd at all, but it was different than the name made it out to be.  Maybe all the Emos hang out there on weeknights, but on this Saturday, it was Sufjan fans, and I didn't find an Emo among them.

"What's an Emo?" you ask?  Like all things, Wikipedia has the answer.  It's also a genre of music I'm sure I'd hate, but that's not was Sufjan's about.

In fact, this concert was billed as, "The Sufjan Stevens Christmas Sing-A-Long Seasonal Affective Disorder Yuletide Disaster Pageant On Ice ft. SUFJAN STEVENS."  I confess that I was skeptical.  The title sounded a little too tongue-in-cheek to be taken seriously, even though he has made two epic Christmas albums of 5 CDs each.

Happy to be wrong was I, as most of the concert was indeed Christmas music, with about half of it being of the sing-a-long variety.  If you've never sung "O Holy Night" in a room full of drunks, you're really missing a once-in-a-lifetime experience that can create good fodder for your blog the next day.

Sufjan is an enigma. He has great arrangements of Christmas songs, especially "Holly Jolly Christmas" and doesn't shy away from the sacred (see "O Holy Night" reference above.)  In fact, for Christmas he also sings non-Christmas hymns, and last night he did his glorious rendition of "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing."

This was the Wheel of Christmas.

But as far as I can tell he's an Atheist. The logo for his Christmas concert was a pink unicorn. "What's a pink unicorn got to do with it?" you ask?  Check Wikipedia.  His closing number before the encore was "I'm the Christmas Unicorn."

I'm sure he likes his aura of unpredictability and cultivates it as part of his artistic image.  The concert was a great time, with even most of the drinkers behaving very well.  I'll be buying "Holly Jolly Christmas" for sure.

The lake that's a river

Look on any map and it looks like a river.

There's no getting around it--it's a river.

In fact, it's a river.  The lower Colorado.  In 1960 or so they built a damn and called it a lake.

Whatever it is, it's awesome.

I'm at the Holiday in on Town Lake, which must be a rebellious or Republican hotel because the river has been officially named Lady Bird Lake for some time now.

It has a great running and biking trail running the length of it, with several very large parks as well.  I rode a kayak on it, and it reminded me of being in Foster City.  I kind of want to buy a kayak now, but I have no place in Utah to put it down.

Here's what it was like in Austin:

Not my feet.

That bridge stinks like nobody's business, because a lot of bats live there and keep doing their business under it.

Cheese and chocolate

I started a new tradition on my trip to Austin this weekend.  In cities I visit, I'll find a good local place for artisan cheese and chocolate, then find a park to eat them.

In Austin I found Edis' Chocolates and Antonelli's Cheese Shop.

Edi is fairly short and very friendly.  She makes truffles, cookies, flourless cakes, and even a mini baguette, which I picked up thinking it would go well with the cheese I'd buy later.  I got six truffles: Grand Marnier, Mexican Vanilla, Coconut (not so much for me), Black Salt, Chocolate, and Almond.  Guess what was the best truffle.  Chocolate.

If this is changing between lots of different pictures of truffles, I don't know how, but I like it!

Antonelli's was the best cheese shop I've been to.  Their cheese case is laid out in the order it's best to sample the offerings, starting with fresh cheeses, moving to the softer ones, and then going gradually firmer and sharper until you get to the bleus at the end.  I tried and bought some of the best Gruyere ever, which did go excellently with that baguette.

The staff is smart about cheese and friendly, even offering us a sample of chocolate with almond brittle, knowing that we'd already bought our chocolate allotment at Edis'.  They also had some Beehive cheeses from Utah.  That Gruyere, by the way, was $20 per half pound.  Somehow I didn't notice the "half" on the sign, so it cost twice as much as I thought.  Worth it.

And somehow on December 2, Austin was sunny and 80 degrees, the perfect weather for a great picnic.

It's not a restaurant; it's a litte theme park

When I came to Austin a few years ago, I was a tagalong in a group of people I didn't know very well.  It was for the International Association for K-12 Online Learning conference.  It was early November in 2008, I think.  I saw the bats.

One night the group was going to go out for some barbecue.  I'd been told about The Salt Lick.  But we were with someone who used to live out there, and she recommended another place that left the kind of impression that I can't even remember the name of the place.  I do remember that the head of cattle on the wall would sing Happy Birthday to you if you were unfortunate to dine at this place on your special day.

I wasn't about to go back.  I rented a car for the specific purpose of driving the half hour out of Austin to visit The Salt Lick.  It was worth the drive, the money to rent the car, and would have been so even if I'd blown out all four tires on the way.

It's not so much a restaurant as it is a theme park.  The place is massive, several acres out in the middle of nowhere.  And since the restaurant isn't zoned to serve alcohol, they built a winery next door where they sell booze, and then you have to carry it over to the table.  They allow you to BYOB from anywhere.

It was like a carnival when we got there, with popcorn machines, lemonade stand ($2, and then you walk it over to the restaurant.  They squeeze it when you order it.  Awesome.), and stage for live music--the best we saw in Austin, the live music capital of the world.

And then there's the barbecue.  There are barbecue joints all over here.  There's one just outside my hotel, and I've yet to leave the place when I haven't seen some new one.  I hear that the place over on 11th street has won some awards and love from the locals, but it can't match The Salt Lick for atmosphere.

Our waiter wore a "Salt Lick Eating Crew" tshirt.  We got a sampler of all four available meats--Brisket, Pork Ribs, Turkey, and Sausage.  They have three sides--Potato Salad, Cole Slaw, and beans.  All were good, and none were sweet.  No sugar in the cole slaw, nor any mayo.  It's a barbecue sauce base on the potato salad.  I'm not suggesting it's any healthier, just unlike what you get at most barbecue joints.

It also smells fantastic.

I didn't order one, even though calories are free on vacation.

They have two items for dessert, Pecan Pie or Cobbler (though it comes as Peach or Blackberry.)  I can't comment on them because I didn't order any.  I had to get out to the concert.  I'm in Austin!

White noise

The other day I was staying in a guest house that someone provided me in Moab.  It was a two-night stay.  The view is gorgeous in Moab no matter where you are.

When I got back to the house on the second night after a great hike, the battery in the smoke detector was dying.  You know what that means, right?  Really loud chirps every thirty seconds or so.  I was dead tired from getting in very late the night before, so I really needed some sleep.

I'm in an unfamiliar house, it's ten at night, and I know where nothing is.  Even if I could find a nine volt battery (or go buy one) I couldn't change it because the smoke detector was on the vaulted ceiling well out of reach.

I closed the door to the bedroom.  That helped some, but I knew that I'd be constantly thinking of when the next chirp would come and I'd never get to sleep.

So, if I couldn't eliminate the noise, I decided to try and drown it out.  I downloaded this free white noise app for my iPad.

I tried several of the calming sounds.  I knew I couldn't turn up the volume too loud, or I'd never get to sleep anyway.  The campfire app sounds like a crackling fire with crickets in the background.  I found the perfect volume so that every time the smoke detector chirped, it just sounded like one of the crickets by the fire.

I slept like a baby.

Larry Thomas is who, now?

I met Larry Thomas.  I even got a picture taken with him, though he was ignoring me at the time and maybe didn't actually know.

Larry Thomas played the Soup Nazi on Seinfeld and he came down to the Owlz game a few weeks ago as part of a promotion for Gandolfo's, which wanted to sell some soup. So, they brought in a guy famous for telling people they can't buy soup.

I'm sure it worked, because the line for Mr. Nazi for signing the ladles that the Owlz gave away was super long.

By the way, Larry Thomas has also played Osama bin Laden and Saddam Hussein.

This is Thomas as Osama walking with some schmoe who's playing President Bush.

When I googled Larry Thomas Saddam Hussein, no picture came up of what I was looking for, but I did find this one, which is of neither Hussein or Thomas, but I thought was funny enough to post anyway.

He also told a story about when he was on an airplane and a flight attendant said to him, "I guess no soup for you?"  The guy sitting next to him didn't get it.

Fireworks and dogs

On Pioneer Day morning I walked around Oquirrh Lake.



It's a nice walk when I don't have time to get to the canyons.

This time, there was a non-leashed dog wandering about.  Eventually, she started following me, which I encouraged by whistling for and praising her.  I didn't know where the owners were, but figured I could either find them after my whole circuit of the lake or check the dog's collar and make the connection that way.

She was a good dog.  Eager to please, and also eager to chase ducks.  Eventually, we made it all around the lake without finding anyone who knew the dog, but plenty of people who seemed please to see her.  At least one of those people wasn't so pleased, because that person called the Daybreak rent-a-cops who sent someone along to chastise me for having an off-leash dog.

Back at the beginning, I checked Emma's collar and found out her name was Emma and that she had a phone number.  I called.  "Do you know Emma?" I asked.  Yes, she knew Emma and had been looking for her overnight.  Fireworks set off in the neighborhood the night before had scared her to the point of taking off when she was out to tinkle.  She ended up about a mile away from home and across Bangerter Highway.

It was a nice reunion when Mom showed up to get Emma, who was thrilled to see her.

Oi--society!

I just got back from the hot tub.

I discovered while I was in Cancun that one thing I appreciate in life is modesty.  No thanks on the skimpy bikinis, thanks.  I think that makes even beautiful women look cheap.

And it's worse on twelve-year-olds.  They really shouldn't wear such things.  Their parents really shouldn't buy them.  There are men that aren't me, who would find such things titillating--is that what their parents are going for?

I unfortunately could also hear these girls talking, complaining about living in "Troy's house," and quoting Troy saying to their mother, "Smack that ass."  Oh, okay.  That explains something about the outfit.

And then the girls stand there with their arms folded over their bare torsos.  The boys (who wear perfectly reasonable bathing suits, thank you) asked why girls always stood like that.  "Because we think we're fat."

First, these girls were eighty pounds with their hair soaking wet from the pool, and second, why the string bikini, then?

More family magic

I went to Idaho for the fourth of July.  My sister lives in Idaho Falls.  After a day there, it is very clear to me why the Eternal plan we're part of is a family-centered one.

There's a connection that comes with family, even extended parts of it.  The love I feel for my nieces and nephews amazes me, and I'm sure it's dwarfed by the feelings of their parents for them.

My sisters in-laws, whom I've met but am not close to, were around for the holiday.  Big family get-together at the park.  The whole group probably had close to two dozen children.

There's no reason for that group of individuals to get together except for the fact that they're family.  And I don't know, but if they're like any other family, there's baggage they overcome in order to get together and be nice.

But I think that's the point.  Family is so close and has such potential for love and joy, but is still full of imperfect, sinful people who hurt themselves and each other.  I think that hurt can be exacerbated by the fact that the pain comes when there should be such love and devotion.

But that's the lesson, I think.  Forgiving family has the greatest potential to show us the fruits of real forgiveness, because no matter the pain, the disloyalty, or the betrayal, forgiving one's family means that all the same potential for love and joy is still there.  And choosing forgiveness lets you experience that, while holding grudges means you won't.

Just like the big plan.

Family magic

I saw Brave last weekend.  Opening Day, actually, at a matinee, in a theater full of children with their moms, and sometimes dads.  And that was appropriate, because the movie and the experience afterwards reinforced the importance of family.

I'm not going to give away a secret about the movie, or I'm going to try not.  If you've seen the preview (if not...)

 

then you know that the movie is about a Scottish princess who tries to change her fate because her parents want her to get married to one of three Scottish goofballs.

To get out of this, the princess, Merida, does something that turns out to be horrible for her family. It's an accident, of sorts, but a selfish and horrible one.

Yet the mother's reaction in the movie is just what I'd expect from a mother.  She doesn't hold a grudge, and even though she's justifiably angry, she spends the movie obviously loving her daughter, growing closer to her, and helping solve the problem Merida created.  The film isn't quite as good as some of the best Pixar movies, but the message is.

And then after the movie I went to the restroom.  You should know, at this point, that when guys use urinals we just pull down whatever covers our bottom half just far enough to take care of business.  At least, we learn to do that over time.  When I was in elementary school, I once dropped trou all the way down in the boys' room in sort of a "feast your eyes" moment, though the intention was just to pee.  I got laughed at by enough older boys (one would have been enough) that I never made that mistake again.

Well, there was a wee lad in the men's room at the theater who made the same error, and both halves of the moon were showing as I entered.  But this laddie's older brother, seeing his brother's predicament, went and stood guard behind him, so that his backside was protected from strangers' eyes.  Then after the older brother lifted him up to reach the soap and sink to wash his hands.


Family creates the kind of bond that makes otherwise young and immature people do simple and selfless things.


It's no wonder that life on Earth is a family-centered plan.

Hikes

Utah is just a fantastic place for being close to the city and also close to some of the best mountains in the world.  In a single weekend you can get pictures like this.

This first set is on the way to Red Pine Lake up Little Cottonwood Canyon. Running water may be the best sound Earth makes, and I love to walk along it on gorgeous days like last Saturday.  The snow was melting and running down, though as you'll see below, not quite enough of it had completed its journey.

The first part of this hike is steepish and rocky.  Good news is that there aren't bikers, but the bad news is that it's as hard on knees and ankles as it would be on tires.  After you hit the first creek run, you can go one of two ways.  I went toward Red Pine Lake.  On the way you see the mouth of the canyon opening to the Salt Lake Valley to the west.  

It was too early in June to complete this hike, especially if you didn't know that and wore open toed shoes, like I did.  So did Robin, who I met on the mountain.  Up high at about where I expected the lake to be, the trail and most of the mountain was still hidden by snow.  For a while she and I braved the cold and wet feet to find it, even climbing like monkeys on some rocks that protrude from the mountain and snow above a running stream beneath it.  But whatever that was I knew it wasn't a trail that leads to a lake.  Eventually, Robin and I both decided that the lake would be there in July when the snow wasn't, and we'd be back.

Then I drove to Moab, which conveniently has one charter school that scheduled its board meeting for early in June before it gets unbearably hot there.  My favorite hike there is Negro Bill Canyon, but this time I went for variety over familiarity.  I hiked the Moab Rim Trail.  It's listed as a three-mile one-way hike with 900 feet of altitude gain.  The websites don't mention that the whole gain comes in the first half-mile as you climb a mountain with no trail at all, just rocks.  And even though it's early June, there's still plenty of sweating to be done.  But as you climb, you're rewarded with views like this.

The Colorado River running by the Rim and parts of Canyonlands (I think) in the background.

Looking to the east, the city of Moab fills a valley between the red rock mountains.

If you forget your hat, you're bound to get sunburned, especially up top where the hair isn't as thick as it used to be.  So, you move your hair around to cover the barer spots at different times and end up with a do like this.

This bush was singing "She'll be coming around the mountain when she comes."

  By now it's pretty warm, so I went to hike the Powerhouse Trail along Mill Creek and found this:



You have to cross the creek three times in knee deep water to get here, so remove your phone from your pocket.  This swimming hole was a ton of fun, but it was also great getting here.

Love the contrasting colors.

For some reason you have to tilt your monitor counter clockwise to get the effect of this mini trail between the rocks and the foliage.

This waterfall was a bear to climb the first time.  There's another trail to get to the top of the cliffs that surround this pool, but I didn't take it.  So, I climbed up the moss-covered rocks against the water.  There are moss-free sections of the rocks on which your shoes (wear water shoes on this hike--not a good idea to have to take off your shoes and go barefoot here, though some people were that crazy) can get a grip.  But I was paralyzed with fear for about three minutes before I was able to take the last few steps and grips to get above the water.



As you can see, there's a few people there already, all clothed (I found out later that this is a popular place for the teenagers to skinny dip).  The cliffs are probably just under 20 feet on the left and about ten on the right. Braver souls than me made the big jump, doing flips and whatnot. One guy even found a spot to do a wall run for about four steps on the cliffs before jumping in the water.  It's only about six feet, so no diving.

Then on to board meeting, where the locals love to hear how much I love their town.

Then, just to round everything out, I went to Bell Canyon Reservoir a few days later.

Isn't Utah just grand?

Isn't life just grand?

Scots fest

I went to Scotland in 2008.  It was for a wedding, so I give props for the wedding being the best part.  The actual best part was the day of the wedding when the groom and I speed-golfed.

That's very good form.

So it's always fun to go to the Utah Scottish Festival at Thanksgiving Point each June.

This year for the first time I went on Friday instead of Saturday, so I got to see the strong man competitions.  Very burly men get out and flip tree trunks, throw weights over a high-jump bar, and lift massive stones over their head.  Not their own stones.





For the burly ladies, they also have a rolling pin toss (is that chauvinist?) over the bar.  I didn't watch that because the marching bands were getting started, and its not just the kilts that make that worth watching.  The drummers are not only talented musicians, but also talented stick twirlers.



Food wise, the festival leaves something to be desired.  There's a booth that serves Haggis, but that's only so-so when it's done at its best, so I'm not about to try it at a fair booth.  Instead, I always get a meat pie, which is English more than Scottish, and tastes kind of like English food, which means it's nothing to write on a blog about.

The highlight is always the bands, especially Molly's Revenge, with their way-into-it fiddle and bagpipe player, and the Wicked Tinkers.





Yeah.  That song is called "Wallop the Cat."  Good times.

There should've been more dwarves

If there is a movie that is prettier to look at with a dumber script than Snow White and the Huntsman, I can't think of it.  While the movie will likely be a candidate for several Oscars, including for cinematography, make-up, and some good costumes that Charlize Theron no doubt makes look even better, it will win no praise for writing, acting, or directing.

The movie is often nice to look at, but the dialogue and delivery are so bad, and at key times even so laughable, that the movie would have been better if it just muted the actors and just let us watch the pretty pictures.

Snow White suffers from its obvious attempt to be Lord of the Rings-y.  There's a dark phantom army that turns to lumps of coal when they're stabbed, dwarves (which are the best part of the movie), and a rousing speech before the final battle.  But Kristen Stewart is no Viggo Mortenson, and Snow White is no Aragorn. "Fight like thundering waves," from Bella Swann just doesn't carry the same gusto as, "There my be a day when the strength of men fails, but it is not this day."



As a director, Rupert Sanders, who's mostly done commercial work, has the good sense to pick good cinematographers and very skilled technicians, but direction to his actors couldn't have been more than, "Scream this part really loud."  You'll grow to hate all that screaming by the end of the movie.  Scratch that, by halfway through the movie.

And why does The Huntsman of the title fall for Snow White?  That's a mystery, as is at what point in the movie he developed any feelings for her.  Somehow he does.  Perhaps in the movie's world love is a state of no emotion or connection.

I could complain more about the movie, but I can't do so without spoiling things for anyone who still might want to see it, so I won't.   Instead I'll end positively.  When the dwarves show up, I got hopeful for a minute, hoping that the movie was about to take a turn for the better.  It only lasted a few minutes, but for that few minutes as you recognize the guy from Deadwood, Hot Fuzz, and Sherlock Holmes in fantastic make-up and looking completely integrated with normal-sized folks (the one thing that this movie actually does better than LOTR) it's pretty cool.



If you must go see this movie, bring ear plugs and just enjoy the scenery.

Ghost Falls

The Wasatch Front has to be the place on earth with the best ratio of big city proximity to mountains and recreation.  Today, my friend Nathan and I hiked to Ghost Falls along the Bonneville Shoreline Trail, the entrance to which is in the middle of a neighborhood of homes in Draper.  Here are some views of the valley while we hiked:

Unbeknownst to me, but knownst to Draper City and unannounced to me by them, the main trail to Ghost Falls was closed today for a bike race.  Closed to hikers, anyway.  So we had to go around the long way, which was awesome.  Better exercise and better views.

Because it was cold Saturday and Sunday with lots of rain in the valley, the mountains beyond us were freshly capped with snow.

While our part of the mountain was green and lucious.

I've hiked to Ghost Falls once before, or tried to, but couldn't find the falls.  Maybe my sister, who is a wimpy asthmatic with bad knees, and I just petered out before we got that far.  (Love you, Reb.)  But since we had to go all the way to the top of the mountain and then back down to approach the falls from behind, they were easy to find today.

I don't know what the dealio is with this.  Every since I started taking pictures with my Samsung Galaxy S2, I get this upside down or sideways problem.  It's stupid.  I rotate the pictures, I save them, they show up fine on my computer, but when I upload them here or to facebook they show up all cattywompous. 

Quit complaining and turn your monitor on its side.

Quoting movies

I like friends and family that quote movies with me.  Rebby's good at that.  Adam's good at that.  In Mexico, we quoted The Three Amigo's a lot.  He'd shout at me to, "Hold up your hat!  Higher!"  He quotes Jurassic Park with me, too.  "Some of them smell.  Babies smell!"

Once I was at the actual Field of Dreams, where the movie was shot, in Iowa.  I stood in the outfield and shouted out loud, "Hey! Is this Heaven?"  Someone shouted back, "No. It's Iowa."  Nice.

Last night was a church activity sponsored by my committee, so I was there to help set up.  We were putting paper tablecloths on the tables and taping them down.  I shouted, "Give me more unidirectional bonding strip!"  Not a single person said back, "Mr. Lightyear wants more tape."  What is with people?

Later on when I was sweeping up with a dust mop, someone was in my path, so I loudly and dismissively said, "Out of the way, peck."  Instead of a knowing smile, though, I got a dirty look.  And that happens every time I say that, which is every time someone is standing in my way.



I've decided that recognizing, using, and tolerating random movie quotes is a necessary attribute of any girl who wants to enjoy my chicken salad for eternity.  Especially if they can quote things like, "Follow me!  I'll follow you!"

Cancun

The beach is beautiful here. The combination of the soft sand on the beach, the sunshine, and mid-80s temperature of both the air and water make this what has to be one of Earth’s most perfect places.

Earth's perfect water.

It took us a while to find church on Sunday. The church’s mapping program didn’t match the maps of the city we got here, and neither of those maps matches the actual roads. We drove around a lot of the non-touristy part of Cancun asking several people. Four guys in white shirts and ties asking for directions to church. One lady asked us if we were “Mormona.” That got us excited, but she sent us the wrong direction.

Finally, one guy knew it was just around the corner. So we got there after the sacrament and during testimonies. I of course couldn’t understand anything except the end of everyone’s testimony—even Adam’s, when he bore his. Good meeting, though. A sister talked to Adam after Sacrament because she used to live in Mexico City where he served his mission. No connection other than that, but good conversations. Mormon’s are cool.

On the flight out here from Phoenix the flight attendants asked if anyone was there on a honeymoon, which I guess is a common thing on flights to Cancun. There was one couple, and we all cheered. They were at church, too. In fact, the groom had been roped into playing the piano for the hymns. We talked to them after Sunday School, and it turns out they are coming along on our trip to the Mayan ruins on Wednesday.

Monday was our first excursion. We met at the mall where a local dude, Merak, took us around in Hummers to see some Mayan ruins, ride some zip lines, swam in a natural cave pool populated with bats, and went to an interactive zoo.

That's Merak on the left.  He says that Mexico means "Belly Button of the Moon."  We aren't sure if we believe anything he said, but he was a fun tour guide.

That's Adam Harward driving the ATV.   The best part about riding the ATV through the jungle is arriving at the cenote, below.

The cenote is a natural underground pool.  Water is cooler there because the sun doesn't hit it, but the water is still clear and refreshing.  Too dark to take pictures in the sinkhole itself, so you don't get to see the bats or the zipline.

The zoo was small, and if it hadn’t been interactive it would probably have been boring. But they actually let you in to the habitats and can hold and feed some of the animals. I held a crocodile and a snake, and fed deer, birds and monkeys. Many of the monkeys are wild and just hang out at the zoo for the free food. I would do the same because free food is a motivator for me. I’m not that far removed from the monkeys in that respect. Also, I have that big gap between by big toe and the other four, and can curl them all under.

The most amazing part was the macaw. We got to feed this bird some peanuts. She’d take the peanut and softly crack the shell with her beak. Then she’d stick in her tongue and fish out the peanut, and put the shell with the other nut in her claw. Then shed hold the peanut gently with her beak, put on enough pressure to break the red skin that’s on the actual nut, and peel it! She’d drop the skin and eat the peanut. Amazing. She could get the whole peel off in a single piece. I wish I’d have video taped it.

After we came back, we went back to Tacos Rigo to get some more of their delicious tacos, and then went to see The Avengers, because why not see the biggest American movie when you’re in Mexico? It had Spanish subtitles, so we figured that was perfect. But there’s a part of the movie when the talking is in Russian. The subtitles were still in Spanish. Luckily, we had one return missionary from Mexico, one who took Spanish in school, and one who missioned in Russia. I had already seen it, so we ironed this unexpected wrinkle pretty easily.

Tuesday was a beach day. We woke up and pretty early made our way to the beach. It was warm and sunny, as it has been every day here. We rented a few boogie boards, but the waves were a little small to make much use of them. But we all spent plenty of time swimming in the Caribbean, which is gorgeous in every way.

Yesterday on our excursion we stopped by a little vegetable market and bought the ingredients for guacamole. I made that today after the beach. It was delicious, though I could do better in a full kitchen with a pantry that has kosher salt, fresh pepper, and people who like cilantro.

Then tonight, in what will probably be the highlight of the trip, we went to the ballpark downtown to see the Tigres play the team from Tabasco, whose name I can’t remember. I thought baseball in Mexico might be the same as in Japan with the extra rowdy crowds, but nope. It was almost like an Owlz game, except with cheerleaders and better food.

I cut my foot twice since we’ve been here. The first was in the cenote on Monday. There’s a zipline in it, and I rode it, dropped into the water and my foot hit a rock on the bottom. Then yesterday we went to a flea market thing to buy a few souvenirs. I got three cool looking tshirts. I stepped on a big crack in the sidewalk in my flip flops, cut my foot on the jagged concrete and fell down. I brought bandaids, but it’s a bummer to be here at the ocean with an open sore on my foot.

Today was no ocean, however. It was another excursion day and we went to see Chichen Itza and Tulum, to famous Mayan ruins with temples and stuff. Our tour guide was Helaman, a member from down this way who’s been a tour guide for thirty years or so. He told the story about how he’d always been showing people around these sites, but when he got a call to teach seminary and was reading the scriptures more and more, he decided he should specialize in touring LDS people. He thought he could show people like us how the Mayan ruins and culture are consistent with the Book of Mormon.

Chichen Itza.

That's Tulum, with its main temple in the background.

We looked at the design of Mayan temples and he showed us how similar in design they were to the description of Solomon’s temple in the Old Testament, which was based on the Tabernacle from Leviticus. The Mayan calendar I almost the same as the calendar as Leviticus describes also. We learned about the symbolism of figures on the Mayan ruins and he pointed us to scriptures that explain them and show how the Mayans traditions are described in the Book of Mormon.

We’d actually look up the scriptures right there, since many of us had our phones with us. It was awesome. We also planked and Tebowed at the ruins, which was cool.

We all love Tim Tebow.  We're respecting him, not mocking him.  Or, we're just acting like goofs.

It was so hot out there away from the water. We were inland, but it was still very humid, and we all sweated plenty. When we got home I took a dip in the pool and made fruity frozen drinks.

Thursday was another beach day, with tacos in the evening.  That might sound boring and routine, but in Cancun the routine is relaxing and refreshing.  And AWESOME!  More time in the pool than the beach today, mostly because of the open sores on my foot, which aren't getting better.  No worries, though.  The pool is fun for its own stuff.  Like, I found out I can beat Adam at HORSE when we play in a pool.

We played some Texas Hold-em that night, and I won at that, too.  We just played for M&Ms and Jolly Ranchers, and in the end everyone ate it all anyway. (Except the Jolly Ranchers.  Who buys Jolly Ranchers to bet with in poker?  Devon Ellis, that's who.)  I ended up with bragging rights only.

Friday we rode SeaDoos on an Ocean Safari, which is properly named only if you consider safari to be synonymous with riding SeaDoos.  We did park in the sea and jump in with snorkels for about 20 minutes near a reef.  There weren't a ton of fish, but there were some, including a school that kind of followed us around.  There was also a sea turtle.  I only brought my phone as a camera, so I have no pictures of anything under the water, but the Caribbean is as clear as the air.

When we came home the next day I couldn't walk from riding the wave runners, so it was just as well that we sat on airplanes for seven hours.  By the way, US Airways sucks.  I guess all airlines suck, but at least the others don't try to push a credit card application down your throat on every leg of the flight.

The vacation was perfect in every way, including the length.  A week away from real life is just right.  I got tan enough, rested enough, and energized.  Now I'm ready to get back to work with gusto.  Everyone should spend a week in Cancun.  I'd like to do it every year.  Maybe next time with a girl.

Please?

Or not.